A wedding party consists usually of the bride and groom, their parents, groomsmen, bridesmaids, attendants and sometimes flower girls and ring bearers. When making the decision on having flower girls and ring bearers in your wedding, there are several factors to consider.
The first factor involves actually having a family member or friend that has children. If you don’t know of anyone with children, then the decision about having children in the wedding has already been made. Please note: just because you may not have family or friends with children early in your engagement, this may change over the course of your engagement. So, if your heart is set on flower girls and ring bearers keep the option open. You and your fiancé may become friends with someone that has children, and then the option of flower girls and ring bearers may be possible.
Just don’t solicit strangers that have cute children…
The second factor to think about is if the children are age appropriate. Yes, that means your 13-year- old niece may be best suited as a junior bridesmaid and not a flower girl. Additionally, if you have a child under the age of 6, you may want to consider having someone (trusted family member or friend) walk them down the aisle. A child younger than six may not be able to stand for a 20 minute and more ceremony, so once the child makes their way down the aisle, it would be completely appropriate for him or her to sit with their parents, family members, etc. You and their parents will probably need to spend a little extra time preparing children under the age of six as to what they should expect on wedding day, and what their important role in the wedding will entail.
To give an example: at a recent wedding the ring bearer (7-years-old) pulled a flower girl (3-years-old) down the aisle in a decorated wagon. Behind them, another flower girl (6-years-old) walked down the aisle, slowly dropping flower petals. Subsequently, the ring bearer pulled the wagon with the flower girl over to the side (out of the way), and he went to stand with the groomsmen. The parents of the youngest flower girl picked her up out of the wagon and she sat with them for the length of the ceremony. The oldest flower girl stood with the bridesmaids. The flower girl and ring bearer stood the entire time, watching the ceremony, and behaved very well. There were a couple moments when the ring bearer became a little antsy and the best man of the groom gently put his hand on the ring bearer’s shoulder and he calmed down.
Having children in your wedding can be absolutely delightful while filled with beautiful moments, and really cute pictures. There may be situations with the children that you did not prepare for, but sometimes those impromptu moments make great memories. Even if you do not have flower girls and ring bearers in your wedding, remember you will be surrounded by family and friends that love you and are there to support you. Here’s to your wedding day!